As I reach the 36 weeks mark I have found myself suddenly very nervous. As useful as my NCT classes have been, mainly because they have introduced me to so many other lovely parents-to-be, they have also worried me sick. There are so many things to consider about what kind of Mother I want to be…do I want to Breastfeed, do I agree with dummies, shall I attend baby massage classes? All of a sudden there are all those ‘recommendations’ you feel abliged to follow just becuase some guy in a white coat has told me that is how I should bring up my baby.
I am far from the ‘Mother Earth’ type and as much as the idea of baby yoga and re-useable nappies sound great in concept, part of me can’t help but think they are a load of rubbish. I don’t see how meditating with my baby and taking myself to a faraway land is going to help me when I am surrounded by a mound of washing and covered in baby sick (or even worse). I have always been cynical and I do doubt things. This is probably why in a ‘relaxation’ class, I couldnt help but focus on the fact I was being asked to close my eyes in a room full of new faces and children running in and out where someone could of happily helped themselves to the contents of my Celine bag. Not that they would but I just can not get comfortable closing my eyes around people I don’t know too well. I just can’t escape the everyday, so I have come to realise that things like hypnobirthing are never going to work for me. Part of me feels like I am being a bad mother for not realising the so called positives associated with them. I wish I could take myself away from it all and actually relax but I have never functioned this way and I know these things have been trialled and tested but there is no ‘one size fits all’ approach. I am not being ignorant by not doing these things, I just can’t.
The same goes for Breastfeeding. We are all well aware of the Breastfeeding debate. It is something I very much would like to try and do, yet I also understand that it isn’t always possible. There is a pressure being placed on all Mums-to-be that they need to breastfeed otherwise they aren’t putting baby first. It is something I feel that I have to do and I am worrying that it may not be a possibilty for me. I know there are so many positives from breastfeeding and I am going to give it a really good go but Mums shouldn’t be made to feel bad if they can’t or don’t want to. As long as they are fed, watered and loved surely that is all that matters. I would never think of someone as not being a good mum because they don’t breastfeed…all Mum’s who love and care for their children are good Mums, in fact they are great Mums!
I am a strong believer in instinct and completely trust my own. I know what will be best for my baby and I don’t think it is up to anyone else to tell me how to bring my child up. Yes it is great to get advice and I am happy to listen to different approaches to my child’s development but just because something is ‘on-trend’ as such doesn’t mean I have to follow it…does it? Trends change like the wind, and just because something is ‘in’ currently doesn’t necessarily mean it is best!
Sorry to get all serious on a Saturday morning…I hope you all have a fantastic weekend. P.S. how amazing is this jumper by Selfish Mother? It’s in the hospital bag ready for the big day!!
Love Hattie x