Since Ted is reaching the TEN week mark I felt I should do a little update of life with my new title. I can’t believe it’s been ten weeks since this little man arrived on this Earth. My life has been so crazy and hectic but never felt as full of love as it does right now!
Ted is becoming more of a character each and every day. He’s smiling constantly now and really is babbling away. It’s so nice to have him respond to you. Just this morning I was greeted by smiles and baby talk rather than a cry or a scream. I think he feels he can connect with you more now and as a result he is so content. He’s lifting his head (even though he still looks a bit like a nodding dog, hence why he has adopted the name Churchie) and is really wanting to sit up and be a part of everything – God forbid you lie him down! I swear he is even trying to laugh now. Each day he is becoming more and more of a little man and it’s so exciting what milestone he will achieve next.
We always knew that Ted was going to be a big lad since I was told so many times when I was pregnant that I was having a dinosaur. When that 9lb 6oz ball of chub arrived, it was apparent that he was going to be tall as he is ridiculously long. To me though, he’s still so tiny! I guess I don’t know any different but I’ve always seen him as being teeny and fragile. That, however, has now changed. A few weeks back the NCT girls arranged a big Mama meet up. We all excitedly went to the park for the first time since all the babies had arrived. Everyone was busy cooing into each other’s pushchairs at the sight of newborns…until they got to Ted, where the coos soon turned into wows. Ted easily looked a good two months older than them all and his head, easily, looked twice the size. I clearly have an England rugby player in the making on my hands – even though his dad would prefer him to wear green! Not surprising really when, at his 6-8 week check, he was measuring 12lb 10oz!
It’s funny how, as the weeks go by, the sheer amount of things baby is experiencing for the first time slow down and the firsts for Mama start increasing. First time leaving little one with just Dad (truly terrifying), first date night, first proper haircut in what feels like forever…first full nights sleep maybe (I’m still routing for that one but I feel it’s getting closer). You start to get past the ‘I have a newborn’ stage (not that Ted has ever really looked like a newborn) and normality starts to kick in. I hated leaving Ted the first couple of times. I was constantly checking my phone and couldn’t take my mind of the thought of him. By the third time leaving him with my parents for a couple of hours, I quite enjoyed having some me time – I have never felt more guilty in my life. It was nice to have a chat with friends without being spat up on or having to constantly worry where the nearest changing facility was. I was allowed to be Hattie for a while, not just Ted’s Mummy. I hated the fact that I enjoyed some time to myself but I felt so much better afterwards for it. I think it is so important to make a little time for yourself, whether that be a nice hot bath, a hair cut or time with friends.
Even though I have been at this for ten weeks now, it still feels oh so new. Just when you get one thing cracked something else pops up. They like one thing one minute and hate it the next. It’s all part of the game I guess and I do love the challenge. I know I’m not the perfect mother, I don’t think there is such a thing. I’m ‘guilty’ of staring at my phone when I could be reading books to Ted but I would give that boy anything in my power and I completely devote my days to making him happy. There are times, like this morning, we you are covered in the contents of an exploded nappy where you think ‘what has my life become’ but ultimately I feel fulfilled. I feel like I’ve found something that I’m good at and enjoy and is worthwhile. I’d go so far as to say I think the world is a far better place with my little man in it. Teddy Bear needs me and I’m going to be as good a mother as I could possibly be!
Lots of love,